Long time since I felt the need to say something, but today! Today I had an opportunity to host a GriefShare group for my church. I have done this for many years, but today I was reminded of how far God has taken me from that first moment, the first, days, months, even years after my son’s death. He allowed me to be personal with the group and in the process it happened. A look back! Sometimes we need a look back. To see what was before the look back, when were were in it….grief..the pain… the happened and when we couldn’t see or know where we would land or how joy would come back… The days when we say it was a good day, but the day when we can say…I am good, I am healed. The look back allowed me to remember how he is faithful and true. How he keeps us. He, our Father because of his love and the love of His son, Jesus.
It is still there, the love, the memories of my life with my son, my first born, but I have joy. In the look back I briefly remembered, as the tears flowed from my eyes. I felt the missing, but I also knew the healer and he had healed me. In that moment, I wanted them to know that I too have been in the in-between. He healed me from the thoughts of what cudda, shoudder, if, why, what could have and so much more … the uncomfortable, painful, inbetween. . Where you can’t feel joy. You want him to bring it, you want relief. Today, I say He will bring it, in doses like a doctor does when he prescribes the medication you need to be healed. Just as you have to take the medication over time, he heals you in time. It requires you to trust Him and believe his word. Expect Him to deliver what He promises. So, what is my word for today? The in-between is hard. Others think they understand but they don’t. They try to console you and little do they know the words that they say…..
Cover yourself with the word of God and his faithfulness. Know that what he promises is true. Connect with people you can give you the support you need. Most of all remember God is near to the brokenhearted and a bruised reed he will not break…what do I mean? He knows that that your heart is broken, and he is near. If I could tell you some of my conversations. So, in the in-between, in the uncomfortable, the right after, the sleeplessness that you are going through. He will keep you till you get to that place of healing.. the place where joy is found and lived. I can’t tell you how, but I can tell you he will. Not because I think it’s true, I know it. The look back reminded me of what was, the look back was meant for me to tell you I have been but now I am.
Restore'N Joy 