I find myself in an unusual state this year. I am between sadness and joy. I don’t recall being there in a very long time. I ask myself why? Why are these two seemingly co existing in this holiday? I find myself remembering and missing, while remembering and feeling the joy of the memories. Memories of my son, my mom and dad, and my sister. Wanting to see them, experience time with them. In the remembering also a wondering when will it be me or when will my children go through the holiday without me. Kinda morbid…. So, I start to read Luke…Lukes account of the Birth of Jesus, his account of Elizabeth and Zachariah…and I am reminded, reminded of why I have joy! Joy even in the middle of the sadness. This year I am staying with my eldest son, his biological mom passed away..transitioned last year. This is his first year at Christmas without her in many years. I pray that my being here is bringing him joy in his sadness. Today is actually his birthday…he hides his feelings, has always, he and my next to the oldest daughter are good at it. I won’t inquire, I will just be here…hoping that he has some joy in this day. God granted him two moms who loved him very much, two moms who did not have to compete with each other but cared deeply for him and were friends. So I miss her, knowing what we did together.
So back to the top….maybe today you are experiencing pain, a mixture of pain, sadness and joy….. Read Luke Chapter 1-2 and reflect on the wonderful Savior that God loved us so that he gave for us..that everyone that believes in him has eternal life ( John 3:16). He, as my pastor said Sunday, recovered us and covered us…and because of that, I have joy, even in the middle of the sadness. There will be a reunion…one day!
Restore'N Joy 